How many seconds are there in a year?
Based on an ordinary calendar year, the not so astounding answer is 31,536,000.
365 days. 8760 hours. 525,600 minutes. 31,536,000 seconds.
I’m not sure about you, but I was expecting something like 10 billion. Yes I suck at math, but 31.5 Million? Really.
Assuming you’ve been on this planet for 40 years, that’s 1,261,440,000 seconds.
Okay, we’re finally in the billions, but c’mon, these are seconds folks. And you my friend, are over the hill.
But even if you’re not in the over-40 club, you now realize how precious those measly little seconds are, right?
Have you spent your life counting them? Looking to the next “thing ’round the bend?” Trying to get past your current state, like there’s a constant ticking in your head?
Have you been tripped up by misery, compounded by exponential increases in dread, following by heaping mega-doses of angst, and giant dollops of worry? Only to think about the next thing that will get you out. Move you up? Make you happy?
Ya, me too.
And upon closer inspection it’s not so difficult to find the gnomes in your noodle who want you mired in the muck of uncertainty, unhappiness, and dread.
In fact, if you’re doing any of the things listed below, those evil little bastards are winning out, turning your time (read: your darling little seconds) into blips you just want to get past.
So here are five Reasons Why I’m a Failure (and You Are Too). Things you (and I) do, but need to stop:
1. You Time Travel.
I wish I could take credit for this, but I can’t. I’ll just thank James Altucher, but here’s my bastardized version:
Your brain is the time travel machine. If you find yourself regretting the past or worrying about the future, you’re lost.
My brain gorges on past failures and future worst case scenarios, and it’s always taunting me with this crap.
What’s the solution? Breathe. I know this isn’t what you wanted to read, AND I also know you’ve heard this a billion times, but have you tried it, consistently?
The next time your overactive noggin starts dwelling on the past or worrying about what you have to do.
Stop. Relax. Breathe.
Put your brain in self-repair mode, today.
Whenever a past failure or possible future pain interrupts, breathe and focus on your task at hand. Train yourself to do this over and over and over.
2. You Don’t Bleed Enough:
Quick, think of five bloggers you love to read. If your list is similar to mine, you have five writers skilled at displaying their war wounds and past ugly business for all to see.
Taking their mutilated, soul-crushing, broken past (life experience) and turning it into good (valuable, inspiring, actionable advice). Content that is thoroughly entertaining AND helpful.
So why not use your past experiences to craft something in the form of words. Don’t dwell on what happened, write about it. Tell the world about your mistakes and the lessons you’ve learned.
What do you have to lose with some 2,000,007 blogs on this pale blue dot?
I can’t answer that, but I will tell you bleeding a little helps, and it’s a win-win, because:
A. It’s therapeutic for you and …
B. You’re helping someone, somewhere.
So, go ahead, do it. (Just don’t make shit up).
3. You’re Not Drinking Your Morning Juice:
Think about something you can’t not talk or write about.
Do you have one?
For me it’s this: I feel like a 25-year-old trapped in a middle-aged body. I despise convention and the “acting your age” mentality that pervades our culture.
So, I’m continually leveling up my life and business, because I feel convention closing in on me like a brain-cramping vise. I fight convention and I want you to do the same.
I want to help you find your core, tell your story, and build a brand that sells, by leveraging the amazing power of the online space. I also want to motivate you to move.
THIS is the current “thing” I can’t NOT talk or write about. Work to find yours and drink it in every morning.
4. You’re Afraid:
Remember you’re first roller coaster ride and what it did for you? My son calls it, “the feeling.”
Now think about something you’ve always wanted to do, but it gives you pause because you’re terrified of what might happen.
Just take on that wicked scary “thing” you’ve always wanted to do—public speaking, starting a business, wrestling bears (never mind, don’t do that).
But realize those jitters are what your soul needs. Take step one and embrace that spine-tingling sensation, over and over and see what starts to happen.
In a nutshell: Deal with your fears, for this will make your life more enriching.
5. You’ve Mastered The Art of Negative Thinking:
Like you, I’ve gone through periods where I was depressed for a million and one reasons. And yes, sometimes there was bad shit going on in my life, but I was dwelling on the bad instead of working to get myself out of a rut.
This mindset saps your energy, and even worse, you’re never, ever ready to take advantage of the great things that come along.
A. Golden opportunities don’t present themselves to sad sacks.
A new friendship that could change your life. An amazing business opportunity that pops up at just the right moment. This stuff won’t happen if your stuck in the mud and doing nothing to get out.
B. A bad attitude leads to more counterproductive behavior.
In my past life I was insular, terrified of the world around me. I time-traveled and avoided social interactions. I procrastinated. This all lead to bad sleep and worse dreams; leading to a lack of energy and a general malaise that sucked me dry.
C. You see the world through your distorted, self-absorbed lens.
This is how you train yourself to see negative instead of positive.
The solution? Stop traveling to the past and future. Live for the moment.
Yes, sometimes life lobs a 30,000 pound bunker buster in your direction, and many days are tough (this is why it’s easy to have a bad attitude every day).
It’s hard work to get past it, but get into a daily ritual that does not let negativity win out.
A good practice? Stop thinking about yourself and see what happens. Take it from someone who spent years in a self-absorbed bubble.
So, in summary …
1. Stop living in the past and trying to predict the future.
2. Bleed. Don’t be afraid. Others will learn and you’ll be healthier for it.
3. Let “it” Out. If you have a “thing” you can’t not talk or write about, get busy.
4. Fight the Fear. Give it a daily pop in the kisser.
5. Master The Art of Killing Negativity. Sometimes there’s nothing you can do about it, but 89.9 percent of the time, there is.
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